Just The Lovely

Tuesday Confession:

You know how so many blogs have special themes each day of the week? Like GPOYW (good pic of you Wednesday) or Friday Fashion....stuff like that? In the same spirit, I've come up with my own theme for Tuesdays. Even though it doesn't have a cutesy name, I decided to make Tuesdays my day to cop to my many vices and mental issues. (Won't that be fun, especially if you hate my guts?) So here we go with week 1 of spilling my guts. Maybe you'll identify or learn NOT to make the same mistakes.

I've been wrestling a lot lately with the idea that I'm powerless over certain situations or people. I would be the first to say that you can't force someone to change, but inside my head I always think that I can be pretty influential at least. I know this comes from my Dad, who can and will go to any length to solve a problem. I learned from him to keep going; to grasp at every little last tendril of hope and see where it leads until there is absolutely nowhere left to turn. Rarely do you run out of options in finding a solution if you're willing to explore creative options. In marriage, this thought process has caused me to believe that I can convince my partner to change his mind, behave differently, or give me what I need if I just keep arguing.

The question is no longer "can you make a person change", but "should you try to make a person change". At times, my decision to do this has led to exhaustion, frustrated relationships, and resentment down the road.I think I've finally reached a place where I've realized it's unfair to try to mold someone into who you think they should be, even if you can and society would agree that some change is necessary.  I'm learning to adapt myself to the situation rather than adjusting the situation to suit my own comfort. This is especially important in parenting, since kids are easily manipulated and you have to learn when to assert your beliefs and opinions, and when it's time to let them experience things their own way.

On a completely unrelated note, I'm seriously questioning whether or not it's necessary to scream during x-rays and CT scans. I mean, if your leg is only attached by a thread or you have a nail lodged in your skull, go ahead and let loose with your most primal scream if you're conscious. I doubt it will help, but you've earned it for sure. If however you sprained your big toe and you're making sounds like you're birthing a cow, you might need to man up. This is just my observation from my seat outside Room 8 every day.