Just The Lovely

Imagine a worse start to the morning. It's garbage day so you go to wheel the trash to the curb. It had been raining cats and dogs and the lid to your trash can had fallen off. The result was a big can full of garbage stew. Dog poo, rotten meat, etc floating in stinky water. Throw some maggots in just to top it all off. Then you go to move the can and panic when you realize you're losing control of it. It begins to tip towards you, spilling a tidal wave of garbage water and soaking you from your shoulders to your feet. Then because of the torrent of water you are knocked off your feet and land in the pile of garbage that has spilled onto the ground. As you get up you see toilet paper stuck to your $100 Merrill hiking shoes. Your daughter's face is red with barely contained laughter. You swallow your gag reflex and head for the shower which of course makes everyone late. This my friends is how my day started, but like Lydia said, it can only get better from there.