Over the past two or three difficult years I've gradually let myself become someone I'm not. I look at myself, and in a lot of ways don't like what I see. This doesn't scare me or make me hate myself. I just don't like it. I'm at the place now where I'm wondering how exactly I find myself again. As far as I can tell, I have three options. First option is... I could gradually begin to work on those areas where I've changed. I could remind myself constantly of who I am and what I'm not. In order to do this I'd have to think about myself an awful lot, which doesn't sit well with me. Second option is...I could spend time praying that God would just heal the areas where I've been hurt or scarred. This isn't a bad idea, but I know that healing and change don't really happen without some sort of effort so it seems a little too easy. Third option is that I could forget about myself. I could lose myself in helping other people or get wrapped up in things that bring me joy. That would be life a la Rich Mullins (I sincerely apologize for another RM reference but the man was full of great ideas).